Things can get better …
If you landed here, chances are that you are experiencing some distress or concern. Whatever it is, things do not need to stay the way they are. With help, you can get better.
I am an Internal Family Systems Therapy practitioner and a qualified Life Coach, and I can work with you on the causes of your current difficulties and on the creation of a roadmap to look at the future, if and when you are ready for that.
Internal Family Systems is a cutting-edge, evidence-based therapeutical modality that is gaining increasing popularity among the public, in the academic world and among mental health professionals. To learn more about Internal Family Systems jump here.
My practice is CURRENTLY full until JULY 2024
Get in contact at massimo@ifs4all.com if you would like to enter my waiting list.
Thank you. Massimo
How I can help ...
Undesired behaviours.
We all have our way to zone out, soothe and distract ourselves. Some people go a bit too far with that, to the point of damaging their health, career and relationships. Alcohol, drugs, sex, porn, food, shopping, internet, and other very personal ways to distract from and compensate for the hardship of living or the felt sense of not being ok. This also includes the apparent “non-behaviour” of procrastination.
Emotional Overwhelm: anger, sadness, fears, numbness.
The relationship with one’s own emotions can be complicated. Some are overwhelmed by emotions, either melting down into a pool of sadness or raging into scorching anger. Others feel frozen and condemned to watch life happening from behind a glass. I also work with clients who secretly feel vulnerable but for the fear of being weak, they create internal walls and defences, transforming their vulnerability into anger or fierce avoidance of deep relationships.
Intimate Relationship dilemmas.
Intimate relationships can raise challenges, fears and intense emotional upset. I work with both individuals and couples to identify what is really happening under the surface of arguments, aiming at reestablishing a common vision or rather making difficult yet healthy decisions. Individuals may also notice a negative recurrent pattern in their romantic relationships, and together we can find ways to break it.
Feeling Unworthy or Ashamed of yourself.
Related to the popular label “low self-esteem”, feeling unworthy and ashamed is a pervasive and painful condition that I unfortunately know first-hand. Even if you are a successful person you can still feel the bite of unworthiness in the pit of your stomach. In IFS we believe that worth is not something that we need to earn, it is an instinct given to us at birth together with our beating hearts. To feel unworthy, something must have happened to you, and this is what we are going to explore together.
Responsibilities vs
Life Enjoyment balance.
Some people sacrifice their enjoyment of life for their careers and success, while others sacrifice their lives to serve and help others. In the long term, these well-intentioned sacrifices may get you close to burnout. On the other hand, I also help people who have made their attachment to freedom into a commitment-free, yet lonely “gilded cage”.
Confusion about what to do with your life.
For some of us, it is not easy to know what we want. Maybe different parts of us want different things, or we learned to pay so much attention to what we “should” do, that our sense of autonomy has got lost somehow. On the other hand, the fear of failing or being “too selfish” to have personal goals, can create an internal wariness about having any aspirations or needs in life.
How does it work?
IFS is a compassionate journey
inside your “internal family”.
Everyone has at least once said: “There is a part of me who seems never to be satisfied with what I do”, “There is a place in me that feels so vulnerable, scared and needy that I don’t want others to see it” , “I don’t know why I did that … something in me takes over and I keep doing things that then I regret”.
Internal Family Systems (IFS) sees all these different energies and drives as if they were different “members” of our internal family. Each one trying to do their best to keep things safe and make our life fulfilling. All is done for good reasons, but often parts of us use outdated strategies that are not effective or that can be harmful. Sometimes they even engage in big arguments with each other!
My role as an Internal Family System practitioner is to guide and support you in exploring your internal family and your external circumstances and see how these relate.
It is an experiential exploration that starts with talking about things, just like regular counselling, but it then goes beyond words and cognitive understanding. You can get to know your inner world in a variety of creative and powerful ways, including somatic awareness, visualization and internal dialogues.
While we move through the landscape of your situation we use curiosity, openness and compassion as a navigation compass.
We identify burdens that somehow your system has taken on from life events or other people, and we incrementally release them. Eventually, things get looser and more spacious. It is from this place of spaciousness and perspective, that effective solutions to internal and external dilemmas can be found.
Once you are at peace with yourself and your past, moving forward becomes an instinctive and reasonably effortless process.
To learn more about Internal Family Systems you can read this article from the IFS International Institute and watch this interview with Dr. Richard Schwartz, the main developer of the IFS model.
SESSION feeS:
IFS for ALL
Therapy and coaching are renowned for being expensive and accessibility to treatment is sometimes a concern, especially at a time when the cost of living poses challenges to many.
The IFS community of practitioners is sensible to this issue and I join the collective effort of making IFS more accessible and affordable by offering my sessions on a sliding scale fee that starts at £40 for individuals and £60 for couples. Clients choose their fee without any questions asked.
Although this will still be too much for some, I hope it will open possibilities for others.
We can start by having an initial 30-minute free conversation (with no obligation) so I can better understand if I am able to help you and you can experience how you feel interacting with me before considering working together.
All sessions are delivered online via Zoom
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Individual IFS Sessions 60 min - on a sliding scale of £40-60 (no questions asked)
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Couple Sessions 90 min - on a sliding scale of £60-80 (no questions asked) See also dedicated page.
If you need some individual separate sessions during your couple work these will last 1h and cost £30-40
All fees include individual assistance via email between sessions
Note: Although I am a trained practitioner in Internal Family Systems therapy and a qualified Life Coach, according to UK law I am not a licensed mental health professional. I don’t assess, diagnose, or treat specific mental health disorders. It is your responsibility to identify if you need such specific treatment, and in which case to seek it from a licensed professional.
Massimo very tenderly held the space for me to explore my relationships, using a variety of tools and modalities in a gentle and effective way.
Feeling safe and being guided I was able to unlock and discover the patterns running in my life, with Massimo’s wisdom and clarity I gained a new perspective and was able to make sense of things.
It has been a very healing, liberating and empowering process, unlocking in just a few weeks what I’ve felt caught in for a lifetime.
Laura, Devon UK
I learned to let myself be more vulnerable and, as a result, my relationships are more intimate and deep. Right now, I am experiencing my very first healthy romantic relationship and it’s thanks to Massimo as well.
He has also helped me develop some great skills that I can use in my relationships, like communication.
I am now able to understand and communicate clearly and more easily what I need and what I want.
Fabiana, London UK
Massimo is an excellent coach who is professional, present, intuitive and has a very good rapport.
He held the space and supported me to reflect on points on a deeper level, and coached me to explore differing perspectives using various tools.
I found the sessions very productive and pleasant and would be happy to book future sessions with Massimo.
K.M. , London UK
My intimate relationship was stuck. Massimo’s insights, professionalism and above all his compassion shone brightly.
He enabled me to see patterns and truths of what was going on both in my relationship and within me, that I could never otherwise have seen.
To say that he was helpful is a massive understatement. Above all else, he was willing to go the extra mile with me that was beyond anything I could reasonably have expected.
I don’t have enough words to express my gratitude. If you have any similar issues to mine, you surely won’t be disappointed in engaging Massimo’s help.
Nick, UK
Some testimonials
ABOUT ME
I am a practitioner of the Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapeutical model and a qualified Life Coach. My own struggle with relationships and low self-esteem has led me into a big life search for healing possibilities.
I have been involved in Yoga, Meditation, Emotional Dance, and Buddhist practice in monastic settings for several years.
My services and programs are based on both my professional training and my personal story (click here to learn more).
My work is fuelled by my passion for a world with fewer conflicts, fewer fantasies and more love made real.
